I find some think that because I am open with my illness that I want to be in the spotlight or have the attention. It’s a bit of a misconception. If you remember, I am naturally shy. I prefer to be at home, where I feel comfortable and safe. I like my introverted qualities to be honest.
I do speak openly about mental health, exercise and our family and friends’ charity, maybe some other things too. But I also do not share everything.
If you have encountered me and I am awkward, it’s because I am awkward.
I am always nervous about new situations and meeting new people. I analyze every single part of what I do after I have a conversation. I have a, I guess you can call it, unique mind. Maybe like many others.
I do not like being the centre of attention at all. Yes, I speak publicly and openly, but there are reasons behind why I do what I do.
I speak openly and lead by example only to show you that it can be done. You can survive mental illness like I did. I believe it’s possible. I do believe though that learning about mental illness at a young age, to know the signs prior to spiralling, is key. It would have helped me greatly.
I also feel like there isn’t enough taught at a young age. I feel like sometimes we try to protect our children by not telling them about this scary world, but I don’t know if that’s right. When I was young, I wish I knew more about this world and how to protect myself.
Our character is most likely developed at a young age, so why do we wait to teach about the world.
And this world is a difficult place sometimes, I wish it wasn’t. Surviving this world though is possible, not easy, but possible.
Speaking openly on my experience with mental illness wasn’t a choice for me. I didn’t choose to speak openly. It was chosen for me. I never made a decision. It wasn’t an option. No conversation was had. I just did it and knew it was the right thing to do.
And just because I speak openly, it doesn’t mean you have to. If you are not ready, that is fine and if you are never ready, that is fine too.
All I need you to know is that you can survive what this world throws at you, trust me, I have been thrown many things, and it has just made me want to fight more.